Tuesday, March 4, 2008

The Taming of the Two Year Old

Everyone has recovered from their featured illnesses of last week. Appetites are back,(the demand for lollipops is in full swing & the consumption of noodles is plentiful), energy levels are up, ("play mommy, play with me" is the choice phrase of the week),the circles under my eyes can once again be hidden behind concealer, and Kendall's defiance has returned.(she was down & out for a few days there, but could still manage and good fight)

We now have the "naughty spot," in full swing. She is given a warning about her negative behavior and the spot is threatened, and then upon second address, she is in it with an explanation as to why she is there and that she is to stay there until she hears the beeping. The timer is set for 2 minutes, and I return her to the spot again and again, with no words, until she just sits, (screaming and crying is permitted, after all she is in the naughty spot, but it is ignored). The timer goes off, and I go to her, explain the behavior again, " Kendall you were in the naughty spot because...", that I didn't like it, ask for an apology and a hug, and tell her that she needs to listen to Mommy.

The hard part is deciphering what I deem is truly a negative behavior bc I do not want to over use the spot and have it lose its novelty. I have to think, is she bored, is she hungry, is she tired? I try to redirect her, or feed her, or give her some time alone, based upon what I think is the issue and then if the tantrum or negative behavior continues one warning, and then that is where she is.

Thanks Super Nanny.

Easier said then done, but we are trying to tame a two year old child, not a dog. Thankfully Kendall does not act out physically or dangerously. Sure there are the occasional slaps from her, but I believe that they are impulse, because once they are addressed once, the behavior stops. I think that was me making the mistake of slapping her hand when she was bad. I am now going to limit those actions to situations where I deem she is putting herself or someone else in danger. Where no warning is needed because she is knocking someone over the head or running into the street after I have taught her not to. Because what I have learned from spanking or slapping, is monkey see, monkey do, at this point. She every once in awhile is caught slapping Ethan or the cat followed by words of discipline, and I feel defeated knowing that I taught her nothing about the behavior that warranted the act, just that it hurts when you do it and you get their attention. I used to also apologize after the slap because she would cry. Saying, " I am sorry I hit you but you were...." With the naughty spot the only one that needs to apologize is Kendall. I am not making her cry because I hurt her, I am making her cry because she is doing something she doesn't want to do, and that is life my friends.

Last night she was put in the naughty spot by Andy. I believe after many warnings from both him and I she continued to act up at the dinner table and then threw Ethan's cup off his high chair missing him only by luck. Andy followed through and put her there, I set the timer, and she sat. I smiled thinking, oh she's got it. Today she was put there after a tantrum that involved meal time and throwing things all over, and I put her there, she took every opportunity to get up! Frustrating. But she did endure the two minutes and then began to behave again.

Kendall all in all is a sweetheart. She means well a majority of the time and is extremely caring. It is just these few incidents during the day that I am put to the limit. I suppose that is a two year old.

Today was Kendall's two year check up. She was so well behaved, everyone there commented on it. I explained to them that Kendall also believes she is a doctor. We at home are constantly being examined by her with her Dr. Kit. So her behaving there at the doctor's office today was merely her being respectful to her colleagues. She does occasionally have unruly patients at home, most especially in Lily the cat, she can be quite the aggressive patient, so she understands the importance of the cooperative patient.

Kendall weighed in at 26 1/4 pounds.(Ethan weighed 25 3/4 just last week)
She is 34 1/2 inches tall ( will find out Ethan's height in 2 weeks)
Her head is 18 3/4 in circumference. (Ethan's is the exact same size right now)

She got her shot like a champ and received a Dora Sticker and some pretzels for her behavior.

This past weekend was also Andy's birthday. (the 2nd) We celebrated with a family party on Saturday night where the kids were both crank balls. Andy then had a poker tournament with some of his poker friends here at our house on Sunday. My sisters and I entertained each other and the kids. Kendall told my sister Meghan upon her arrival to our house that Daddy was having a friend party. She even helped me make a cake for this event and we sang to him with everyone that was there.

So now some screeching calls and I have to go tame some kids and prepare dinner...

All in day of a stay at home mom. I smell of bleach (from crazy bathroom cleaning) and a dirty diaper ( i hate that the smell lingers in your nostrils for longer then necessary)...cannot wait to shower!

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