Incubating*

Yes, it is true. Seems as though this little fetus has decided that my uterus will do for now. Ethan must have had words with it. Something like, ‘You just wait and see little buddy, it is a pretty great place, she eats lots of ice cream, and her skin stretches really, really far so you have all this room. Sometimes I even wish I could go back in there.’

I have already popped and I am nice and comfy in my maternity clothes. That’s right. No shame. The body was like, oh there is a baby in here that is staying for awhile, lets just go ahead and explode. I think I may make the Guinness Book of World Records as the largest pregnant with one child woman. No joke, you would think I am 12 weeks pregnant with triplets.

I haven’t blogged in quite sometime. I know it. But see, my multi tasking skills went right down the toilet along with the massive amounts of pee I now create. Being sick all.day.long, is quite difficult with two small children, most especially when it lasts oh about 8 weeks, from the day I found out at somewhere around 4 weeks up until a few days ago. It still rears its ugly head, but not to the point that I want to consider finding a cave and setting up camp in. So my motto for the children and I as I suffered, quite simple, ‘Keep them alive.’ We did a lot of educational programming as I curled in between them saying sweet prayers to Jesus. Thanking him for the nausea but asking him to keep it at bay for at least 2 hours so that I could clean the massive piles of clutter that had taken over my house. Apparently again, I am the only in my household who knows how to clean. Well, besides Ethan. He is definitely a little helper. Ok, so I have been training him be just that. But I will not send a man from my womb to a wife and not have eyes that see a mess and be moved so much by it that he has no other option then to clean it up. He will clean his toothpaste stains out of the sink, so help me!

So my tolerance level is just gone. It was pretty slim to begin with. How is that possible with such small children you ask? Medication. Slightly more seriously though, I bottle it. All day long. Of course Andy is the direct target on most occasions when the bottle explodes at 8 pm promptly each evening,but his coping skills are much higher, ok, a little bit higher. But oh being pregnant, and having raging hormones that take over your body from your toes to the end of your hair, yeah, Mama’s got a short fuse, you best listen the first time.

But yes we are excited, we are thrilled, we feel blessed. The baby continued to grow each week I saw my specialists. It was a week off at first, and I about kicked my legs out of the stirrups and ran for the hills vowing to get my tubes tied, but then the doctor told me to give it a week, a could have ovulated a week late and so that is why everything would seem off. I did come to an infertility specialist for a reason, not because I thought it was cool, but wait a week? Right. Every morning I woke up pressing on my boobs to make sure they were still sore and just sat around waiting for the acid to build up enough in my stomach from all the hormones that I just wanted to barf all over the house. And then the ultrasound, and it grew. The doctors discharged me to go to my regular ob/gyn at 8 weeks. My first appt is next week with the doctor that delivered Ethan. Don’t you feel some sort of camaraderie with the doctor that delivered your child? I do, most especially since they see the most ugly sides of you, and still let you take the baby home. He has delivered so many babies that I am sure he doesn’t remember me screaming at him to get Ethan out of me. But I don't know how he could forget me screaming at him I couldn’t do it as Ethan was crowning, and just stopped pushing right then and there, leaving my son with a bruise on his forehead for the first two weeks of life. I tell you what, that vagina, that’s some strong muscle right there, it leaves vicious marks. But I remember it all, and I remember him telling me that we will get the baby out together. Teamwork I tell you.

I plan on blogging about pregnancy A LOT. Well because what else is there to talk about, really, people. But life is still going on around me and I will blog about that too. I plan on putting this little asterisk *, see just like that, after the titles that contain subject matter that as a man you may not want to read about, or if you are woman and are just not into hemorrhoids, stretch marks, and things of that nature. You will see this one has it, since I have already made mention to the vagina, peeing, boobs, etc. There will be entries about pregnancy that won’t contain these items, and will consequently not have an * after the title, but you know me, and they will be far and in between, and if that is the case, enjoy the intermittent blogs about other things that I post, and see you post partum. On second thought, you may want to wait even 6 weeks after that since I turn into a wretched beast with itchy, sore stitches and flabby fatty skin, after I give birth, who gets as angry as all get out that she is not Heidi Klum and cannot just jump back into pre pregnancy wear. I will certainly be going on about that too. I know you are as excited about it as I am.

How are the future bigger sister and big brother coping:



No, Kendall and Ethan are super excited. Kendall says if it is a girl she is naming it Jasmine. Umm..yeah.. I think that Ethan gets the idea that there is a baby coming, I don't think he gets that it is inside me, simply to him, I am just fat and crabby, and then someday a baby is just going to be delivered to our front door. Once it gets in the way of him completely wrapping his entire body around me to snuggle, he might just get it a little better. My prediction is, he will resemble this picture for a few weeks after the baby arrives, and if it is a girl Kendall will have a complete and utter meltdown in the hospital over the fact that the baby is in fact not named Jasmine, or any other disney princesses. All is well for the third child, nothing like a warm welcome.

So until the next blog, I will be tending to my offspring,peeing,and sleeping. See you soon.