Monday, June 22, 2009


Apparently someone was a little embarrassed over my Father's Day Gift...and decided that I am not allowed to post a video of Andy snoring...see honey, I am not even mentioning that it was in fact you really snoring in the video...whoops. I mean, how ungrateful can a person be, I was just trying to give him the gift of life.

I, of course, am still laughing about it, this was the greatest video ever. I apologize if you didn't get to see it. I obtained permission though to post the blog without the video. It isn't the same effect, but well, it will still make me laugh every time I read the post and I am reminded of the video...because after all, I still have it in the memory of my computer. I again will remind him that he is doing my readers a great disservice, how are they to know if their partner is struggling with sleep apnea? This was great footage to compare with. But, to each his own, I am called into submission...yup...that's it.

The Original Post:

Oh what to get the love of my life for Father's Day? The man who led me into motherhood? The man who's arms my children run to each day as he arrives home from work filling me with such joy? The man who selflessly gives away his last tastycake to his begging offspring? I thought long and hard.

As I was lying in bed last night in bed clicking away on my computer trying to decide, I couldn't help but realize that the answer was right beside me. I love you honey, and for this Father's Day, I decided to make your life a little easier.

Here is your audition tape for a Sleep Study, I am sure you will get a role as their next leading patient, congratulations. ---FYI---You aren't going to see anything, picture is black for reasons that will soon be made clear to you, make sure volume is on, or you will be like, 'what the heck is this?', not to high, you may shatter your speakers. You're Welcome.---

Here is where the video would be, silly man, not wanting it shown. But ok, ok, I love him.

If you have listened to this in its entirety, that climax at the end is typically followed by air flow ceasing for a few seconds and then a big exhale followed by the sweet snoring symphony beginning all over again. This my friends is sleep apnea at it's finest. I mean, I am just trying to save a life here, all in a day's work, really, no pats on the back necessary. No lie. I listen to this every single night. Do I go to the couch? Nope. Do I slip into bed next to Kendall? No Way. I mean I have a job to do, I have to make sure that he does not need CPR at some point, that breathing does continue. I am this man's life boat. This my friends is commitment, it doesn't get any deeper then this. Ok, so I give him a quick kick in the side, or rip a pillow out from under his head to break the cycle, minor, in the scheme of things.

Here is to celebrating many more Father's Days. After either a C-PAP or a minor outpatient surgery to correct that deviated septum and maybe get rid of some tonsils and adenoids while they are at it, you should be as healthy as a horse. What more could you ask for other then a restful nights sleep?

Oh no need to thank me. Your unwavering love and devotion to me and our children is more than enough.

So readers, spread the word, do your part, we together can eliminate incessant snoring.

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